The founding members of some of the most prominent psychotherapeutic theories (e.g. Psychoanalytic/dynamic, Adlerian etc.) have formed a general consensus that the style of parenting adults take on has a profound impact on the development of children as well as into adulthood.
This month on the HRIC Blog, we’re looking at all things parenting and child development. We’re starting off by breaking down the characteristics of four main parenting styles: Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive, and Uninvolved, and how they impact development.
Authoritarian Parenting
- Establishment of strict rules
- High expectations to follow rules – inflexible and rigid
- Breaking rules results in punishment
- No logical reasoning given for the rules
- High demand of children but low responsiveness
Impact on Development
- Children are efficient, submissive, and obedient
- Children have significant deficits in social skills, relationship-building/maintaining, self-esteem, confidence, and communication skills
- Children may have a constant need for parental approval which is mistaken as parental love
- Children may rebel, misbehave as they get older, and become authoritarian themselves across all relationships
Authoritative Parenting
- Establishment of strict rules (but not to the extent of Authoritarian parenting)
- High expectations to follow rules but employ assertiveness and support rather than intrusiveness
- Breaking rules results in forgiveness and nurture
- Parents communicate reasoning for the rules – communicate and listen to children
- More democratic – high demand of children but also high responsiveness
Impact on Development
- Children are assertive and self-regulating
- Children have high self-esteem, self-confidence
- Children have well-development social skills, are able to form and maintain relationships successfully, and form healthy attachments with others
- Children are successful, well-rounded, and happy
Permissive Parenting (Indulgent parents)
- Very few rules in place
- Low expectations to follow rules and of self-control
- High responsiveness and rarely make demands
- Very rare instances of parental discipline; very lenient and avoid confrontation
- Very nurturing, open, and communicative – more of a friend than a parent
Impact on Development
- Children lack self-regulation skills, self-discipline and self-control
- Children appear very confident but have a high sense of entitlement, and struggle with responsibility
- Children struggle with boundaries, commitment, authority
- Children have high creativity skills and are able to form relationships – however, relationships are often one-sided and focus on ‘take’ more than ‘give
- Children often become unhappy and struggle in school
Uninvolved Parenting
- Rarely any rules established
- Low demands to follow rules and low expectations overall
- Very low to zero responsiveness, parents have rare communication with children and are generally disconnected
- Very rarely, parents will neglect, reject, or abuse children/their needs
Impact on Development
- Children significantly lack self-confidence and self-esteem, and are generally less capable than peers
- Children are unable to self-regulate, or establish self-control
- Children struggle greatly with trust – find it difficult to trust adults, romantic partners, friends, etc.
- As adults, they often have difficulties with forming and maintaining relations, intimacy, and emotions
Sources:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-gail-gross/how-different-parenting-styles-affect-children_b_7813674.html
https://www.verywell.com/parenting-styles-2795072
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201410/how-does-your-parenting-style-affect-your-kids
